Monthly Archives: April 2026

Lila, age 12: “if not us, then who?” Words to live by.

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One of the biggest changes in our family’s life this year has been the arrival of Tillie Billie Eilish — our rescue Beagle-Red Heeler mix.

Before she was first homed in Willis, Texas, about an hour north of us, she must have been abused. Men, in particular, are loathsome to her — me included.

The passing of our dog Rusty left such a big hole in our home and our hearts. It’s been tough for me not to be able to develop a relationship with her. The only person in the house she plays with is Lila Jane, our 12-year-old. She sleeps every night in Lila’s bed.

When I complained about how reserved she is around me, Lila gently nudged: Daddy, look at it this way. You’re the man she likes more than any other!

When she saw how disappointed I am not to be one of Tillie’s persons, she looked up at me with those beautiful brown eyes.

Daddy, she said, think about it this way: who else, besides our family, would be patient enough to help her? If we don’t do it, who else would? We have to take care of her!

Little did our Lila Jane know that she was quoting Hillel the Elder. If not now, then when?

She was also quoting the late congressman John Lewis. If not us, then who?

In a world where kindness and personal responsibility seem to be in short supply, 12-year-old Lila spoke like the sages of antiquity, like a leader of the civil rights movement.

Reading the awful daily news, I keep going back to what Lila said. We surely could use more of that today. Every morning when I sit down at the keyboard, I’m going to ask myself, If not us, then who? If not now, then when? At our house, they are words to live by.

The Pope and the President.

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The early Italian medieval writer Petrarch — the first humanist — had a lifelong quest that was never truly fulfilled. He wanted the Papacy to return to Rome from its “Babylonian Exile” in France. Like his de facto predecessor, the early Italian poet Dante, he believed the Pope should be concerned only with spiritual matters.

Even after the Papacy returned to Rome in 1377, it remained a political and military power. The Vatican oversaw the Papal State in Italy, including four major regions on the Italic peninsula. It wasn’t until 1870, when the nascent monarchic Italian state defeated the Vatican’s forces and took control of Rome, that the Vatican’s forces stood down once and for all.

But that didn’t stop the Vatican from being an aggressively active political power.

It was stunning to hear the vice president of the U.S. arrogantly advise the Pope that he should stay in his own lane. In one widely cited quote, he essentially tells the Pope that he is a liar (his statements should be “anchored in truth,” the VP admonished!).

As a convert to Catholicism, he should be finely aware of the Catholic Church’s history and its role in shaping world events. Ever since the 4th-century “Donation of Constantine” (look it up), leading thinkers have argued that the Papacy should limit itself to spirituality while others have lobbied for it to remain temporal (earthly) in its scope.

But the fact of the matter is that the Vatican has always been politically focused.

The only thing more stunning is hearing Trump-supporting Catholics complain this week about Trump’s blasphemous comments and imperatives. Where were those same Christians when Trump mocked a disabled journalist, when he denigrated a U.S. war hero and senator, when he scolded a TV anchor for having “blood coming out of her wherever”?

Are they finally getting the message that Trump won’t know Jesus until he finally meets him after his death? After all that’s happened, how can they even call Vance a Catholic and Trump a Christian?

I’m sticking with the Pope’s message to the world: “G-d’s heart is torn apart by wars, violence, injustice, and lies.” Nothing political about that!

Image via the Catholic Church England and Wales Flickr.

HSPVA-bound! Congratulations Georgia!

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Ever since the girls entered the Suzuki strings music program at Parker Elementary, we have been dreaming that one day they would attend Houston’s Kinder High School for the Performing and Visual Arts, one of the top performing arts schools in the country.

It’s been a long and winding road since Georgia first picked up her violin (and later switched to viola), paved with honest hard work and genuine sacrifice.

Yesterday we learned that she has been accepted into the conservatory program there. Tears are welling in my eyes as I write this.

Congratulations, Georgia! Beautiful child, brainy teen, “old soul” (as so many people call you), you are a dream come true. You are my dream come true.

Not long before she died, my mother wondered out loud if she should have supported me more in my own music journey.

“Watching all you do for the girls’ music,” she said, “it makes me think I should have done that for you.” I really didn’t know what to say. “But you did all right without me,” she added.

Because of the tragedies unfolding in our lives during my teenage years, Judy didn’t have the bandwidth or energy to take interest in my creative or academic life. I was on my own. But I did “alright,” as she told me that day not so long ago.

Watching Georgia thrive and achieve a highest of heights feels like an empty space in my soul is finally being filled up with joy and promise. Had Georgia pursued a different field or path I would be just as happy. But that she’s doing music… wow… man… The dreams deferred (who gets the reference?) are making way for a soul fulfilled.

Congratulations wonderful Georgia! Mommy and I couldn’t be more proud, more happy, and more excited for your bright future! We love you! We love you!

Israel’s new death penalty is racist and inhumane.

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As the world holds it breath and Trump threatens to rain Armageddon on Iran at 8 p.m. Eastern Standard Time (set your dials!), the U.S. media have only obliquely reported Israel’s new death penalty, passed into law last week.

Here’s what the Times had to say:

“Israel’s Parliament passed a law on Monday that would allow the hanging of Palestinians convicted of deadly militant attacks, but experts say it almost certainly cannot be applied to Jewish extremists convicted of similar crimes. The law is a victory for Israel’s far right and reflects the country’s shift to a harder line against Palestinians.”

“The legislation makes death by hanging the default sentence in Israeli military courts for Palestinians convicted of deadly attacks. Israeli citizens — both Jewish and Palestinian Arab — could also face the death penalty for killings intended to ‘negate the existence of the State of Israel.’ Experts say, however, the chances that it would be applied to Jewish Israelis for attacks against Palestinians are minimal.”

In other words, Jewish West Bank settlers won’t be held accountable for murdering Palestinians because their acts aren’t a negation of the existence of the State of Israel.

“Before the law passed, Britain, France, Italy and Germany urged [Israeli] lawmakers not to enact it.”

The executions will be carried out by hanging because the Israeli medical establishment has refused to participate with death by lethal injection. The executions will have to be completed within 180 days. The time limit will make it even harder for death row inmates to appeal their conviction.

This is the country that the U.S. has followed blindly into the most consequential war of our times. Don’t forget to set that dial to 8 p.m. Eastern Standard Time!

I’m a Jew and I have loved Israel over the course of my life. I visited the country in 2000, not long before the second Intifada began, and I saw how Palestinians already lived in an apartheid state. But I still felt the call of a Jewish homeland, despite its deep-running flaws.

The genocide in Gaza is a crime against humanity. The occupation of southern Lebanon is sure to bring about yet another humanitarian crisis. The war in Iran is threatening the stability of the world (not protecting Americans). And the new racist and inhumane death penalty reveals that Israel can be considered nothing less than a full-blown apartheid state.

How I finally found the family where I belong. (And they’re all coming over for Passover tonight!)

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One of the wildest stories of my crazy life is how I finally found the family where I belong.

Not long after I moved to Austin to be with Tracie (good move!), a man named Marty Levy started calling me from Houston. I knew who he was — my father’s first cousin. Beyond that, he and his family were strangers to me. That’s because he and my father stopped speaking in the early 1980s when I was a teenager.

As it turns out, Marty and his family like fine dining. Before long, I was commuting to Houston every week for one of the best gigs that I’ve ever had. It was thanks to Marty, a personal friend of Tony Vallone, that I began working with the legendary Texas restaurant Tony’s. The job and the Levys are why we moved here to Houston, a city that I love.

Over the years, the Levy and (Texas) Parzen families have shared countless meals and holidays. We have a lot in common (music, food, wine, academia) and we genuinely love hanging out and caring for one another.

Let’s face it: my San Diego family has never liked me. I used to be close to my older brother. That ended when he became a lawyer more than 30 years ago. My little brother and his wife have shunned me since college. In the run-up to our mother’s death, they seemed to want to have a relationship. But it ultimately emerged that they wanted me to side with them against my older brother. Nice, right? No dice.

Why is my original nuclear family so messed up? I attribute the fracture to the black cloud that has followed us in the wake of horrific crimes committed by our father. It’s not easy to love your own family, I guess, when your dad is featured in the local paper for being a prolific asshole.

Tonight the Levys are coming over for Passover. There will be nearly 20 of us breaking matzos together. It’s a miracle. I came to Texas for Tracie. But Texas gave me the family that loves me. Man, I’m one lucky son of a gun to have escaped the misery of Parzen family California. Gut Yontif! Happy Passover! I’m finally home.