Category Archives: de hustonia

Stop using the word “ghetto” unless you really know what it means!

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Something that blew my mind: when my post about my support for Jasmine Crockett blew up (300+ comments and counting), people assailing me from both hard right and hard left used the word “ghetto” in their attacks.

Do they even know what the term means?

Many will be surprised to learn that the word ghetto is Italian in origin. And to be more exact, Venetian in origin.

The first ghetto in history was founded in Venice in the early 16th century, in the neighborhood where the city’s foundries were located. The word “gheto” in Venetian dialect denotes “foundry” (its Latin origins bring it back to iectare, “to throw,” gettare in Italian).

That was the first ghetto in history, created by the Venetians to concentrate the Jews.

The term spread through Europe as other cities mirrored the Venetians’ racist policy.

By the mid-19th century, ghetto came to denote a place where a racial or ethnic group was segregated from the greater community.

The Oxford English Dictionary gives this definition from 1855 forward: “Any area occupied predominantly by a particular social or ethnic group, esp. a densely populated urban area which is subject to social and economic pressures, tending to restrict its demographic profile; an enclave. Also in extended (and sometimes ironic) use.”

An example from Melville: “The belittered Ghetto, forward of the main-mast, wholly occupied by the blacks.”

By the late 19th century, a new meaning emerged: “Originally and chiefly in the United States: a socially and economically disadvantaged inner-city area predominantly populated by African American people” (Oxford English Dictionary).

We don’t use or teach our children to use the word in our house. It’s a historic term in our view, a word that has been used to disparage Black people in our country since before I was born.

If you didn’t vote for Jasmine Crockett because she’s Black and you think that other white people wouldn’t vote for her, well, I’ve got news for you. Your doubly racist. (I’m echoing the words of one of my favorite Houston-based political bloggers, Erika Harrison, @blackgirlswhobrunch; thank you Erika for your awesome writing on the campaign!)

And oh yeah, stop using the word ghetto unless you are going to use it correctly and respectfully!

Photo credit: “Venezia – Cartello di ingresso al Ghetto” by Luca Paolini, CC BY-ND 2.0.

American trolls: 200+ comments, many racist and nasty, from people I don’t know.

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Since when is temperate civil discourse about politics considered intolerable in this country?

Oh yeah, I forgot, it became officially intolerable when in 2016 when Trump disparaged Ted Cruz’s wife and Rubio’s hands.

In case you had any doubts, in May 2024, Taylor Green insulted Jasmine Crockett about her eyelashes and we barely batted one. Crockett responded by commenting on Taylor Green’s “bleach-blonde, bad-built, butch body.”

When I posted my preference for Crockett in yesterday’s Texas primary race, I was expecting to get maybe 30-40 interactions.

Instead I got three times that much and more than 200 comments, many of the overtly racist and nasty, from people I don’t know.

The trolls on Facebook have been out to get me for a while (since I started posting about FIEL). But the oversized response to my simple expression of political joy and hope shows that people like me are targets.

I’ve lived in Texas now for nearly 20 years. Over those decades, I’ve observed the trollification of our state government and the Texasification of the federal government.

One of the best overviews of the Texan political panorama I’ve read is “Paxton Is a Texas-Size Troll. Is That What G.O.P. Voters Want?” by conservative political commentator Kevin Williamson, published today by the Times.

“Texas is more closely divided than you might think,” writes Williamson. “That is in part because Texas is no longer entirely the land of ‘wide open spaces’ but an increasingly urban state, home to six of the 25 largest cities in the country and two of the five largest metropolitan areas. Republicans do not typically fare well in urban areas — they haven’t won a mayoral election in Houston in more than 40 years.”

Williamson calls out Paxton for his corruption and trolling (see the title): “Paxton might be described, without exaggeration, as the most scandal-plagued politician in the country.”

He also calls out Jasmine Crockett for her own brand of trolling: “Ms. Crockett rode that pony a long way.”

I’m disappointed by Crockett’s loss but am giving my 1,000 percent support to Talarico. Let’s hope it’s Paxton v. Talarico, that’s a fight I’d like to see.

How you can help the immigrant community under siege: stand up, speak out, volunteer, donate.

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Many thought Trump couldn’t be elected in the first place.

Many trusted that he couldn’t even stand as a candidate after the January 6 siege of the Capitol.

But all those things came to pass.

Many thought his administration couldn’t organize extra-judicial ICE goon squads that would profile brown people. Many people believed that even if he did, ICE would be subject to accountability — not to mention common sense and decency.

It’s happening, people, even though we wished it wouldn’t.

It’s time to act. It’s time to act NOW.

A lot of folks have read about my pro bono work as a media consultant with FIEL, the largest immigrant advocacy group in Texas, based here in Houston. And many have reached out asking how they can help.

Despite lies about FIEL recounted by Houston Mayor Whitmire and Texas attorney general Paxton, FIEL helps the vulnerable in the immigrant community every day through education, hands-on advocacy, and emergency interventions for those facing wrongful deportation.

FIEL needs volunteers and donations.

FIEL is an education resource, especially for DACA recipients.

It also mounts stations outside of supermarkets and similar community hubs where they distribute literature on immigrants’ rights (“what to do if ICE knocks at your door,” etc.).

FIEL organizes ICE awareness groups (few in our neighborhood realize that ICE did a massive raid at an apartment complex a mile from our home).

FIEL organizes rallies and protests that force politicians to face their hypocrisy.

FIEL sends out court observers to monitor immigration cases (this is one of the hardest tasks but also one of the most important).

I could go on and on about what FIEL does not just for the immigrant community but for our ENTIRE COMMUNITY.

Please start the process of becoming a volunteer by filling out a FIEL volunteer intake form. And please, please, please, if your finances permit it, please give to FIEL.

Thank you for your solidarity with the vulnerable in our community.

Image via the us_icegov Flickr (public domain).

This is why Tracie and I take our kids to protests.

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Above: that’s Emmanuel, center, the teenager who was wrongly detained by ICE and held for 48 days without reason. He had to have his appendix removed while in prison. Photo courtesy FIEL.

On Friday the Parzen family attended the FIEL “ICE out of Houston” rally and protest.

Our girls — ages 12 and 14 — would have much rather been at home playing Roblox and texting with their friends, as they would on any other Friday night.

Instead, they listened to the speakers at the rally: children detained without cause and separated from their parents; a doctor who explained that hundreds of people died in ICE custody last year because of lack of medical attention; a mother whose autistic 14-year-old had to have his appendix removed while improperly detained by ICE.

The whole thing took about 45 minutes.

But they got a sense of how members of our own community are being gravely affected by our government’s profiling of brown people.

They heard a young adult tell the story of masked men in unmarked cars arresting his father and then putting him in a chokehold after he asked them to show ID.

They were reminded that while we drive to school and come home to warm dinner, kids their own ages don’t even know if their parents will be able to pick them up from school.

That’s why we take them to protests: so that they will remember that we are “in it and of it” and that the change is only going to come when we all stand up for those vulnerable among us.

Please consider giving to or volunteering for FIEL, an immigrant-led group that provides resources and advocates for the immigrant community (disclosure: I work for them as a pro bono media consultant).

“Melody” my album of songs for 2025 including “Under the Christmas Tree,” this year’s Christmas song. Merry Christmas!

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Merry Christmas, everyone! Happy holidays!

You know what I would like for Christmas this year? For you to listen to my 2025 album of songs, “Melody”!

Click here to stream on Bandcamp.

Here’s the track list:

Melody

I wanted to write Tracie a yacht rock, slow burn song, and so I did! Music and making love feel like the same thing when I’m with her. “Italian mandolins or Paul McCartney songs/just can’t compete.” I love her so much.

Stuck in a Hotel Room in Dallas

I wrote this, yes, you guessed it, when I was stuck in a hotel room in Dallas on the road for work this summer. We knew my mom would be dying soon. But we didn’t know how soon. My vocals on country songs suck but this one meant so much to me. Still does.

Under the Christmas Tree

“No need to invent/a new ornament.” My 2025 Christmas song! I write one every year. Our tree has ornaments dating back to the girls’ pre-school years. We love it so much and it’s one of our favorite family traditions.

Ballad of Rusty and Paco

This one is for our dogs, Rusty aka RooRoo and Paco. There’s not a day when their joy doesn’t lift me up (I’m a “dog person”). I wanted to capture how much fun it is to share our lives with them so I wrote them a “Rocky Raccoon” song.

Land of Aggressive Driving

This song was born out of self-challenge: I promised the girls I would write them a song about the “land of aggressive driving,” in other words, Houston, a city we love but also a megalopolis where the driving can be insane. As the singer (me) says, just use “the Nancy Reagan defense,” just say “no” to aggressive driving!

Aiutami a farti ritrovare

My old bromance Giovanni Arcari gets a song-writing credit on this one. I heard him utter that line one night in a pinseria (similar to a pizzeria) in his hometown. He was trying to convince a woman to give him her phone number. She didn’t. He said to her (in Italian), I’ll look for you, but help me be able to find you. Sounds better in Italian! I wrote it for him for his 50th birthday.

Merry Christmas! Thanks for listening!

I’ve been waiting for this moment for all my life…

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On Friday night, our oldest daughter Georgia marked her 14th birthday. The next night she celebrated with her mom’s pot roast (a favorite), a beautiful cake from our family’s official pastry chef, Fluff Bake Bar, and a sleepover with two of her best friends from school.

She was also surrounded by her Orange and Houston families. They had gathered for another momentous occasion: earlier that day, she had performed with the Region (as in all-region) string orchestra, one of the top accolades a Texan middle schooler can achieve in classical music.

The conductor spoke about how our region, 23, is one of the two most competitive in the state and arguably the most dynamic (thanks to the confluence of three fiercely engaged school districts in its radius).

Georgia was first chair in her section, viola, and performed a beautiful solo in the third piece.

The music was gorgeous, the performance extraordinary, especially when you consider the ages of the musicians.

I couldn’t have been more filled with joy to hear her play.

Maybe it’s just because I’m an unabashedly proud father.

But it’s also because when I see her, a straight-A 14-year-old with a rich network of delightful friends, I see the kid that I couldn’t be when I was her age.

My family simply wasn’t in a place where they could support my cello studies. And the vicissitudes of life had left me precariously adrift among my peers.

A few moments before the concert began, I squeezed Tracie’s hand and told her, I’ve been waiting for this moment for all my life. And from the moment she and I decided to get married, every instant has led up to this, I said, this beautiful, graceful child who’s growing into an adult as she explores her creativity and curiosity unyoked from the burden of family trauma.

I’ve been waiting for this moment for all my life. Thanks for letting me share it here. Happy holidays.

The worst year of my life, the best year of my life. Holiday blues, open mic at Emmit’s Sat. 12/20.

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Man, it’s been the best of times and it’s been the worst of times.

Losing my mom in October was a crushing blow to my heart this year.

And the heartless way my brothers have treated me and my Texas family in the meantime has left me with an emptiness, a void in knowing that my family in San Diego is now totally gone.

I haven’t felt this alone since Brooklyn, post-9/11.

Watching my children grow this year has been one of the greatest blessings of my life.

Georgia is turning 14 this week and both girls fill me with joy and pride at their myriad accomplishments.

Knowing that they and Tracie will stand by me, even through the helter-skelter and the pell-mell, has filled me with hope and peace in this darkest of times for me.

There’s also something else that I’ve felt this year: I do have a family that loves me, I do have children who are thriving, I do have a partner who lifts me up emotionally and catches me when I fall.

It’s a far cry from the drug-taking, alcohol-guzzling 14-year-old that I was after my family was fractured by catastrophe and my older brother handed me my first hit of weed.

I’ve never felt so much love and support in my life.

My bandmate Bela Adela and I are going to be singing about life’s blues at Emmit’s Place in southwest Houston on Saturday, 12/20, 2-6pm, where we will be hosting our final open mic of the year.

The last event in October was packed and we are expecting a big crowd for our holiday show.

The Rhythmix, the coolest middle-schooler jazz band, will do a set and a ton of people are stopping by for the open mic and jam.

I hope you can join us as we close out the worst of years and the best. Thanks for your support and solidarity.

Please read FIEL director Cesar Espinosa’s op-ed for Houston Press: “The Definition of Courage.”

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Please read FIEL director Cesar Espinosa’s op-ed for the Houston Press: “The Definition of Courage.”

It’s hard to turn on the local news in Houston these days and not see Cesar Espinosa and FIEL in action.

The immigrant-led civil rights organization was not only successful in its campaign to free Emmanuel, the unjustly incarcerated autistic 15-year-old, who spent nearly two months separated from his mother.

It also forced Houston mayor Whitmire to reveal that he was a liar: in fact, his administration had been cooperating with ICE when he claimed it was not.

The mayor tries to write-off FIEL as a for-profit law firm. Nothing could be farther from the truth!

FIEL is a non-profit group that provides discounted legal services for vulnerable and financially stressed community members.

But first and foremost, it is a community leader and builder that advocates for people like Emmanuel and his family and provides educational resources for immigrants in this city (FIEL was founded in 2007 by future DACA recipients and they have never abandoned their founding ideals and aspirations).

I’ve been working with FIEL as a media consultant (pro bono) for nearly a year now. Over that time, I’ve learned something that a lot of people don’t know about FIEL and its director Cesar: not only is he a tireless super hero and champion of human rights; he is also a great writer. I know that because I read everything he writes (I manage the website among other roles I play).

I couldn’t be more thrilled to see his writing published by the editors of the Houston Press. Please read his first op-ed for the weekly: “The Definition of Courage.” Thank you.

Please consider giving to FIEL this holiday season. Their work is more vital than ever.

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“Give to Groups Defending Immigrants From ICE” was the title of a recent opinion by one of our favorite writers for the Times, Michelle Goldberg.

I couldn’t agree more: the work of immigrant aid groups is more vital than ever.

For the last 11 months, I’ve been volunteering for FIEL here in Houston. I run their website and consult on media strategy for them (pro bono).

There are so many compelling stories I could tell about their advocacy and activism. In recent weeks, FIEL and its leader Cesar Espinosa worked to free Emmanuel, an autistic teenager who was wrongly incarcerated and separated from his mother for nearly two months. If you watch the Houston TV news or read the city’s paper of record, then you know that Cesar not only managed to obtain Emmanuel’s freedom, he also proved that our mayor (a democrat) was lying to us when he said that he wasn’t working directly with ICE in our city.

These guys are super heroes, folks. I work with them literally every day and they are tireless in advocating for immigrants’ rights.

But there’s another story I’d like to share with you. Cesar’s brother, Abraham, the group’s education director, recently published an image of Anne Frank on his social media. I immediately called him, I was so moved by his post.

Although so many of us simply drive our cars to work and then come home for dinner each night, there are hundreds of Anne Franks in our community right now, fearing for their lives and their families. Immigrants in this country live in fear each day that masked men in unmarked cars, men armed to the teeth, will snatch them up from the streets. Sound familiar?

As a Jew — as a human! — I cannot turn my back on my people who are facing the same thing our ancestors faced in Europe when my mother was a little girl in South Bend, Indiana.

Please consider giving to FIEL this season. Click here to donate. Thank you.

FIEL co-founder Cesar Espinosa featured in Houston Chronicle. Please consider supporting FIEL by donating or volunteering.

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Please check out this week’s Houston Chronicle feature story on Cesar Espinosa, co-founder of FIEL, an immigrant-led organization that provides legal service and advocates for immigrants in greater Houston.

(Disclosure: I’ve been working for the last six months as a pro bono media consultant for the group.)

I can’t share the entire article here, but here’s a snippet:

    FIEL’s impact is measured not just in legal victories but in human stories. Stories like that of a father deported under one administration, reunited with his family after years of legal struggle. Or the mother who once served Espinosa dinner at a gala, quietly telling him that thanks to FIEL, her son had just graduated from Harvard. He said he still thinks about the young student who approached him after a workshop and said, “Because of you, I finally believe I belong here.” These victories, he said, are what sustain him through the long nights and heavy sacrifices.

Click here to continue reading.

The story of how Cesar, his siblings, and mother faced the challenges of being “undocumented” in this country is as compelling as it is inspiring.

When you read how Cesar and his family began working to help and protect immigrants, I’m sure you’ll agree with me that they are genuine super heroes for our time.

Please consider donating to FIEL or volunteering: FIEL needs people to challenge ICE agents at the asylum court; it needs bodies to show up at protests, rallies, and to populate information fairs. Just following and sharing their media on your own channels helps.

Check donation links and volunteer opportunities on their site.

And stay tuned: FIEL is planning a wonderful event for November 1. I’ll be sharing details here as soon as I have them.

Have a great weekend “on purpose,” as my good friend Annette Purnell likes to say.